the labor story…
One month ago, around 2am I realized, yep this is it! My contractions were pretty mild and at my last check up I wasn’t quite 100% but there are a few other details (I will leave out to keep the PG rating of this post) that made me pretty confident this baby girl was coming soon. This time we planned on trying to go “natural” again. Meaning without an epidural, a feat that I was disappointed in myself for not accomplishing with my son Everett. Since labor with Everett was a grueling 25 hours after getting an epidural 14hrs in, I was bound and determined NOT to go to the hospital too soon! So I jumped back in bed and told John to get out the i-Pad because we were going to watch a movie. Contractions were coming pretty consistently every 3-5 minutes but they weren’t nearly as painful as I remembered from Everett’s labor. So after the movie was over I took a shower. John was getting a little antsy and nervous (typical). I think he just wanted to get to the hospital and make sure we weren’t going to have to deliver on the side of I-95. By 6am I called the doctor and told her I was in labor. And oh by the way, my parents were staying with us so now all we had to do was wake them up and let them know we were leaving… haha. John didn’t feel comfortable going in there so I (in labor let me remind you) went in there room. I stood at the foot of the bed feeling like I was 5 years old again saying “mom, dad… wake up”. You would have thought I put a blow horn to their head because they jumped out of bed like the house was on fire! Both a little foggy, my dad said “we’re going to have a baby?!” I walked out thinking, no Dad I am going to have a baby, but you’re welcome to endure the pain for me.
We got to the hospital and checked in just in time for shift change, awesome. There I was checked again and, hallelujah, 2 cm and 100% effaced though I was somewhat disappointed hoping for more progress. We were admitted to a room where the nurse monitored me for an hour and checked me again. I had progressed to 5cm! HOLY COW… I then realized this was going to be a much faster labor! This time John and I had a different plan then the one we went into Everett’s labor with. For those of you who know the story, there was a lot of walking… prior to the epidural. This time I put on my sound proof ear phones and listened to a little country mixed with some Michael Buble’. Almost hysterically, 2 hrs later I was 10cm and while yes I was in pain and doing some intense visualization I didn’t ask for any pain medication. (intentionally leaving out some graphic details here) 2 pushes later Nora Kathryn came into this world! It was a wonderful, beautiful experience and it made me regret the disappointment I had during my son’s delivery.
Going into both my son’s and now this delivery I had hopes of going natural. WHY??? My answer is pretty basic… just to see if I could. As John says “you did a half iron man, you totally got this”. Thanks babe, but does it even compare. When I didn’t go natural with Everett I felt guilty and disappointed. I felt like I just wasn’t strong enough. Not until Nora’s birth did I realize that every labor is so different! Looking back I would have gotten an epidural much sooner with Everett because I needed it. My labor was much more painful with Everett and my body couldn’t relax.
I am not one that watches “the business of being born” (a movie starring none other than Rikki Lake) one too many times and am convinced that medicine is from the devil and doctors are just there to get your baby out as fast as they can. No, I believe that epidurals are AMAZING, and I thank God everyday for the advancement in medicines. As a nurse, I realize that women take this natural thing way to far! Yes it is beautiful thing if your body allows you to go without medication. I now realize that every delivery is so completely different. I remember a close friend of mine (who is a labor and delivery nurse) saying whenever a woman gives me a birth plan I try not to let her see me roll my eyes. Now I know why she said this. If you plan your delivery and God has a different plan, you might find yourself disappointed and feel like a failure when it doesn’t go as planned.
Childbirth whether by C-section, assisted, with an epidural, or natural is a miracle and NO one should ever be disappointed in themselves! Natural childbirth should NOT be the goal… a HEALTHY baby should. I feel very blessed to have experienced both sides of childbirth and wouldn’t trade either of them!
Wonderfully written, Laura!
ReplyDeleteYou are so right, every birth is different, just like every child is different. When I taught childbirth classes, I told my clients to think of music, tennis balls, walking, rocking, breathing, back rubs, and epidurals as tools to pack in their labor bags. They might not use any or they might use all of them (and others). Thanks for sharing.