Many of our friends have recently asked us “so, how is the
adoption going?” And while this
question evokes many different emotions including gratitude, frustration,
excitement, and fear, I try to continually remind myself of what a virtue
patience really is. We were logged
into China on 8/13/14. This is
technically our start date, even though we started this process about 1 year
ago. We have only been waiting 2 months, but I find myself every day hoping and
thinking about seeing the blue line (see our previous blog post- matching night
is like taking a pregnancy test).
I can’t help but think of my friends and family members who have or are
going through infertility. Let me
prefaces this by saying I can’t begin to imagine what it must be like and I am
in no way trying to minimize the seriousness of infertility! John and I have never had to wait very
long for a blue line. It has
always come freely and quickly.
Waiting sucks! It is hard
and I must say it makes me sin.
This once prayed for thing can quickly become an idol. Our old pastor in Raleigh-Durham used
to say, when “a good thing becomes a god thing (making it your god), it becomes
a bad thing.” Because lets be honest all you think about is that thing. While I try to wait patiently to see
our precious child’s face, I grow weary, become distracted and take my focus
away from why God called us to this in the first place.
I am reminded
in Isaiah 40:28-31
The Everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of
the earth does not become weary or tired. His understanding is inscrutable. He
gives strength to the weary and to him who lacks might He increases powers.... Yet
those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength.
I was talking to friend the other night on the phone. She and her husband struggled with
infertility for years and now have a precious child. But what struck with me was when she said “Laura, if we had
gotten pregnant any sooner, we would never have THIS child”. She is right God’s timing is perfect and
though sometimes painful His plan for that ONE specific child for you is so
much sweeter than you can imagine.
I also think about another friend who has had 5 failed adoptions and now
has the most perfect adopted newborn baby boy at home. I think about if one of the other
previous adoptions had gone through than she wouldn’t have this baby.